Today was quite positive. My session today went very well and although my feedback for my placement so far was not glowing it left me feeling that perhaps i was getting there. I should be feeling good but instead i am wary. My confidence has taken such a dive recently that i find myself waiting for fate to kick me in the teeth and show me where my next fuck up will be.
After the easter weekend i was planning to go up to Norfolk for a few days to see my nephews and i was going to go paintballing with Mark. After thinking about the amount of work ahead of me and forming a tentative revision timetable, i phoned Mark up and told him i would not be able to make it afterall and i would have to visit in the summer. I found myself choking up and having to fight to stop my voice going all funny. The last thing i want is for my brother to think i am falling apart. This took me somewhat by surprise as i had not realised that i was upset about anything at this particular moment. I thought i must be tired and anxious about the amount of work i have to do. But the reason i felt like crying was because i kept thinking that i would not have seen my brother for 6 months by the time the summer comes round. What on earth has happened to make me so emotional and setimental? I am falling apart. Send for the men in white coats.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment